“I hope that isn’t me.”

“I’m sorry, did you need something, Buffy?”

“The heavy bag, I call him Parker, but I’m guessing you have somebody else in mind.”

“You have enough to worry over.”

“Yes, I do. So tell me a problem that’s not mine. Maybe I can actually solve one I don’t own.”

“Sometimes Willow and Xander are a bit much. I understand that they’ve been friends since they were in the cradle. But you would think he’d be a little insulted on Anya’s behalf? I was stuck listening because I had to watch the till. Willow all but called poor Anya a greedy— And Xander simply laughed. You were there. Am I over reacting?”

“Maybe? I mean Xander gets that saying Anya’s greedy isn’t really an insult. It’s like saying, the sky’s blue or vampires are soulless. Willow didn’t mean anything by it and Anya wasn’t around to get her feelings hurt.”

“I have never seen Anya act greedy even once.”

“Oh, come on, Giles!”

“There’s a sign in back of the counter, it states, Management reserves the right to refuse a sale for any reason. Anya put it there after I made that sale to Glory. She’s enforced it a number of times. She has never made a profit that endangered a life. She doesn’t even condone inflating the prices before a sale. I dare you to tell me one time she’s even taken the last slice of pizza.”

“Are you in love with her? That would be bad, she’s getting married to Xander. When I told you to tell me your problem I didn’t thing it would be so, huge and, and, soapy.”

“Buffy, it’s not like that at all. I spend a large portion of my day working with the woman, she’s a friend. She has a terrible past but she’s behaved above reproach in the last few years. I admire her.”

“Even when she’s telling you the details of her sex life?”

“I’ve lived long enough to know that if she really were as happy in that respect as she says she wouldn’t be talking about it so bloody much.”

“Are you sure you don’t have a crush? Cause that sounds kind of like jealous Giles to me. I think for a second there your eyes even got greener. I always thought that was just a saying."
Title: Granted
Rating: G
Summary: A Chaos Mage & a Vengeance Demon walk into a bar and it's no joke. I'll let you all fill in the vengeance.
Disclaimer: I’m not making money off characters I don’t own.
A/N another bit of something that no longer fits into something. Thanks for the beta [livejournal.com profile] janedavitt



"Who's that man down the end of the bar?" Jo's newest customer played with a brown ringlet coyly and confided, "I just love men with British accents."

It was like watching a fire-eater. Jo was both appalled and impressed. She had never met anyone, over the age of four, who could actually pull off coy. "Well, you're in luck; that one says his name’s Ethan and he likes to hear himself talk."

"Hmm, just so long as he says the right words. Let him know his next drink is on me, sweetie." Fire-eater was right. Something in the woman's eyes gave her the creeps, but Jo figured that the Englishman, who had been eying her breasts for the last hour, could take care of himself.

“So, have you changed your mind, my dear?” Ethan asked.

When hell freezes over, Jo thought while keeping on her I want a tip smile. “I waited too long and somebody else has decided to snap you up.”

Coy-girl waved like a little kid when I pointed her out. Ethan strolled up to the table his admirer occupied and sat gracefully. "I'm sure I would recall meeting you before, love," he said.

"We haven't met, but we may have some friends in common." Little Ms. Coy was saying all the right words but Jo could see the body language was all wrong. Oh, she wanted something from this Ethan guy, but not what he was hoping for.

"I'm sure we do; after all, we belong to an exclusive social circle don't we?" Ethan said.

These two were really making the hair on the back of Jo’s neck prickle. She’d learned long ago not to ignore that feeling and moved to the other end of the bar, in hopes that that would be far enough away. She really wished she hadn’t overheard the last thing the woman said. It was crazy because she had sure heard a lot worse over the years. Crazy or not, the word “granted,” featured in most of her nightmares after that night.
AN: This is untitled and unbeta'd and not to be taken serously so don't say I didn't warn you.

After handing Buffy the small bag Anya re-snapped her jeans. She had to had to suck in just a little bit more than she would've liked. Curse those guilt induced snack binges. She tried to convince herself that Xander would jump at the chance if the situation were reversed . After all, she was helping his friend recover from post traumatic resurrection syndrome. "This needs to stop before Xander starts to wonder if I'm pregnant. I'm gaining guilt-weight for you, and you don't even like me."

Buffy put sack down without even saying thank you, and looked for her panties under sagging training room sofa. Anya knew this was to avoid looking at her. Buffy only bothered to put her underwear back on forty percent of the time. "I like you Anya, and not for just this."

"If you can have sex you should be able to say it," Anya said.

"Not just for sex, you tell me the truth. That's kind of novel these days; with Spike gone it's all quiet on the truth front," Buffy said. She had that lost puppy sound in her voice again. The one that led to pleasurable comfort sex and post orgasm Oreos. It made Anya love her, it felt so good to be truly needed but it also made her hate her too, Buffy was using her, but it was better to act like it didn't matter.

"The only reason you like the truth is that you're certain that the answer to Does this make me look fat? is always no."

Buffy stood and looked at the too thin hand holding the lavender thong. "I should ask does this make me look cadaverous. It's what I am, something dead, right?"

"Buffy, look at me, you aren't dead and that's a good thing. I just gave something I would never waste on anyone dead or even undead."

"You've said you've had sex with vampires before. So much for truth!"

"I'm not talking about orgasms. I just gave you my stash of Dove Promises. There's no way I'd throw away good chocolate like that on a zombie or a vamp, not even to keep from eating it myself! Your taste buds are all living, missy. You just need to try. Stop pretending to and really try. Life isn't so bad not when there's chocolate."

Buffy cried and it wasn't the reluctant silent tears that would sometimes squeeze out her eyes. It was big Lucy Ricardo sobs. Between hiccups Buffy told her that her mom used to say the same thing. That life wasn't so bad when there was chocolate. Mentioning Joyce made Anya start to cry nearly as hard as Buffy. Anya was pretty certain that this was what Buffy had needed all along.

A partner with 1100 years of sexual experience was just a gift with purchase.

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